Excuses, excuses

"I have a headache and my nose is running."
"Hmmm!"
"My throat is scratchy, my voice is breaking up. Maybe I have laryngitis?"
"You seem all right. You’ll feel better once you wash your face and have breakfast."
"I have washed my face already. It didn’t help."
"How about nice healthy breakfast?"
"I am not hungry. I am feeling very weak and my neck is hurting. I think I have a fever! Can I not go to school today?"
"Come here. Let me check. Hmmm! Your forehead is actually cooler than my hand. If you are running a fever, then I am having a heat stroke."
"You never take me seriously!"
"I am taking you and this situation very seriously. The rule of thumb that my father used to employ in such situations was very simple."
"And what was that?"
"He would say “You don’t have to go to school, if you are dead"."
"I am not dead, yet. Besides, this strict rule seems like child abuse."
"I never thought like that when I was your age. School is fun."
"I beg to differ!"
"Get ready. Discussion is over."

(Pause)

"Unhhhh! Why do children have to go to school?"
"Listen! You are basically sentenced to spend at least fifteen years of your life in school and college. The sooner you finish this, the better it is. Plus, there is a slim chance that you might actually learn a thing or two."
"Fifteen years! That is not fair!"
"Look at the bright side. If you were in an Amazon forest embedded with Kayapo tribe, you won’t have to go to school but you would rather spend your day running around naked hunting for food."
"That sounds totally cool!"
"How about living without electricity, clean running water or bathroom facilities? They definitely do not use hair dryers, cell phones, internet and sneakers with lights. You won't survive a day."

(Silence)

"I am feeling a little better already. I guess I can go to school. Can you pick me up earlier than usual? I may get sick again."